In today’s marketplace, relationships win.
Seth Godin, in his book Permission Marketing, relates marketing strategy with dating. It’s a supurb analogy, and one that I think more marketers need to understand.
As a company, your goal should be to date your customers, not rape them. Now, this isn’t easy. Dating requires work. It exposes you, and sometimes ends up with your feelings hurt. However, dating results in lasting relationships that build trust, and trust means you win.
So, what does this mean for marketers?
It means that permission and trust should be slowly built over time, instead of insisting that your customers give up everything at the front. It means slowly getting to know them, and finding out about them organically, not via questionaire (ever started dating someone by having them fill out a survey with their interests? Not a way to build a trusting relationship.)
The goal is not to walk up to someone in a bar and ask them “Hey, you wanna go have sex?”. The goal is to walk up to someone and engage in a conversation, find out about them through an honest exchange. You might not even get that kiss goodnight, but you’ll probably get a second date (and that second date will end with the kiss, and so on the more times you go out).
Raping your customers by bombarding them and demanding permission you haven’t honestly earned is a failing strategy. Slowly build a relationship - don’t be the frat guy at the end of the bar that no one wants to marry.
Leave the first comment ▶

My shampoo bottle has a flat cap. So does my wife’s. As does her conditioner and body wash. My body wash, however, has a rounded cap. Am I bored in the shower? Maybe, but I think there’s a valuable lesson in usability, product design and paying attention to your customers.